Fast Screw, Screw Fast

Got up at midnight-thirty feeling like crap on a crap cracker. Wandered into kitchen. Contemplated juice. Contemplated blender. Contemplated beating my brains out against the cabinet door.

Ate two tortillas with cream cheese and salsa. Felt somewhat better. Drank a glass of iced tea. Felt quite better.

Went back to bed, slept great, woke up feeling fine. Big smile, happy about the day.

Juice fasting is not the miracle of rejuvenification I was hoping for. I’m glad to know that apparently Mexican food (or a 15-second approximation thereof) is.

An advance warning… I’m working up to a very big, very angry rant. I’m trying to figure out how to do it with at least an attempt at humor. But it’s about something that makes even Jon Stewart (warning–incredibly boring and virtually agrammatical official bio page) so pissed-off he can barely contain himself. (It’s Bible-thumpin’, fag-baitin’, dislike-of-sodomy-pretendin’, foster-parent-denyin’, covenant-one-man-one-woman-marryin’, nation-under-God-swearin’, Will-and-Grace-fearin’, Larry-the-Cable-Guy watchin’, masculinity-clutchin’ homophobia. That’s what it is.)

More on this fun and fascinating topic later…

About Molly Newman

Writer, cook and trivia/spelling bee hostess, living it up in North Portland.
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5 Responses to Fast Screw, Screw Fast

  1. Elaine says:

    Uh, oh. Don’t tell me that you’ve stumbled upon the evil plot of Spongebob Squarepants, Communist Homo. I didn’t want to say anything, but I heard the little poofta was plotting to infect the world with multi-culturalism and a UN-sponsored New World Order…………Why do you hate freedom, Molly?

  2. Peg Graham says:

    Molly, girl….I guess I’m the one to take the challenge and ask for your presence ova in the Pub just for a bit. You have been put on alert
    as a ‘Missing Pubster’. (Look for Tia’s sit in thread). Juice Fast? Yikes! Mexican….good!

  3. Wanda says:

    Molly I feel your pain!! I have a feeling I know who you are talking about!! There better be an ethics thing going on soon!! Love ya girl!! Wanda

  4. Ben Wen says:

    Stinky Pete!!!!

  5. Lori Villarreal says:

    Ooooh, Molly… I can’t wait to hear more about this…

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