Introducing…

…a feature I’ve wanted to add to the Picayune-Democrat for ages! (Well… months. Well… a couple weeks.)

Jude Law. Orlando Bloom. Brad Pitt. *Yawn.* They’re all so generically pretty, so undemandingly attractive, so, frankly, boooooo-ring. There’s just no challenge involved in appreciating a pair of long-lashed emerald-hued eyes, a broad muscular set of shoulders, a set of cheekbones you could hang laundry on. Sure, they’re nice to look at… but pretty only goes so far. There’s just no there there.

But the flip side of the coin is something altogether different. Unconventional looks, a fascinating flaw or two, a sly intelligence, a wicked sense of humor, a sense of something deeper. Those are the traits that make up the Ugly Sexy Man.

He may be an actor, a musician, a writer, a politician (though the last is not bloody likely). But whomever he may be, we’re happy to celebrate him here.

So without further ado… may I present our first

USM of the Week

JackwhiteIn honor of the new White Stripes album due out next week… I give you Jack White!

Mmm, that messy greasy hair… those expressive eyebrows… those inexplicably pointed ears… that wide, crooked, petulant mouth.

Is he an evil pixie? An alien messenger from the Eyeliner Planet? There is no telling! But he is super-sexy… in an irresistibly ugly way.

Nominations for future USM honorees are welcome… though I have several to get through already…

Jackwhite2_2 Geek girls always love the boys in the band.

Jackwhite3 And he loves Loretta Lynn. How unabashedly awesome can you get?

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About Molly Newman

Writer, cook and trivia/spelling bee hostess, living it up in North Portland.
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6 Responses to Introducing…

  1. Mimi says:

    There is something about him, isn’t there. And yet, Renee Zellweger marries Kenny Chesney???
    Anyway, I heard the album the other day on the radio – it’s great, I can’t wait to get it.

  2. Adrien Brody…Yowza!!

  3. Jen says:

    Oh, you scared me. I thought that was Michael Jackson. Whenever I hear Jack White, I think Jack Black. I’ve got to straighten that out.

  4. cathy says:

    I’m so on this wavelength…the promo pic for their new album at iTunes, with Meg…do you know the one?
    He is so HOT with the little moustache. Mmmmmm.

  5. Gwyn says:

    I know this is overdone, but with good reason–how about Johnny Depp? I mean, not every guy can pull off that male Annie Hall thing and make it look good, right?
    And, I do know how to spell “red.” Though I have always liked to be thought of as well-“read,” too.

  6. t says:

    HAAAAAAAAAAAA! hahahahaaa

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