Fisher, again

So remember how Fisher’s arm was sprained, not broken?

About one o’clock today, I got a call from the urgent care clinic. They’d had an official radiologist officially review Fisher’s X-rays, and it was that radiologist’s informed opinion that the elbow was, in fact, fractured.

I was dubious. "He seems like he’s feeling much better. He took off his sling last night and he’s using the arm just fine."

They urged me to bring him in anyway. "The fracture’s located just under the marker on the X-ray, and that’s why we couldn’t see it before. " (So why can you see it now?)

Jim agreed with me that we’d wait a few hours, or until tomorrow, and see if the arm was still bugging him.

We’d had a hell of a morning, which had resulted in me already leaving the house once to calm down for a while (I drove around, went to Multnomah Village, wandered through the West Hills and had a generally lovely time with lots of LOUD and aggressive music). I’d only come back as soon as I had because I was supposed to call someone early this afternoon about coming to his house to buy some Japanese maples. I duly called him, made the appointment to see them and headed out alone in the xB to pick them up.

Five, or maybe three, minutes after I hit the freeway, my phone rang.

It was Jim. "Fisher slipped and fell on the porch," he said, "and his wrist looks really swollen and messed up. I’m taking him to urgent care to have it looked at."

"I’ll be right there," I said.

"No," he said, "go ahead and get the trees. It won’t make any difference if you’re here or not."

And so, Dear Reader, because I am a cruel and heartless woman without a maternal bone in my body, I headed out to Beaverton and got my Japanese maples. One Acer palmatum "Bloodgood," one Acer palmatum dissectum which may or may not be a "Palmatifidium." They are Freakin. Gorgeous. And $25 each from this guy who propagates them for fun and sells the extras on Craigslist.

Then, as I was heading back into Portland, my phone rang again.

Broken. Fisher’s wrist was confirmed broken.

The elbow, however, was mysteriously not-broken once again.

And I had ample time to mull this all over as I sat in the World Cup cafe at Powell’s, sipping my gunpowder green tea (not nearly so nice as jasmine, which they had run out of) and nibbling a Mayan chocolate biscotti (not nearly so nice as the regular biscotti-flavored biscotti, which were inexplicably absent from the menu) and writing in my trusty Moleskine notebook and just kind of basking in the blissful childless solitude. Mother of the Freakin’ Year, that’s me.

So tomorrow it’s off to the bone-n-joint clinic once again, where Fisher will get another cast (though perhaps this time it won’t be quite so pink) and I’ll settle our outstanding bill from last time and we’ll all have ample opportunity to wonder if someone somewhere is calling CPS on us. ("He’s had how many fractures this summer?" "Well, either two or three. Nobody seems to know for sure." "And how did they happen?" "I can only tell you what he told me; we weren’t actually watching him when any of them occurred.")

Won’t that be nice?


About Molly Newman

Writer, cook and trivia/spelling bee hostess, living it up in North Portland.
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9 Responses to Fisher, again

  1. Elizabeth says:

    I definitely think you should win some kind of prize.
    Geez! Portland is not treating you too good, huh? I think some pizza is definitely in order.
    I was a four hour drive away from home when Zac broke his arm, picking up Hibi halfway from her grandparents’ house. I think it was nice for Paul to handle it for a change–good for me not to always be the parent in charge, and good for him to know he can handle something. He told me he felt good about doing that. So don’t feel bad.

  2. Doc says:

    Triplets + farm + I’m very clumsy too = at least 3 fractures a year for the past several years.. and the only comment I’ve had was one snooty twit who asked if I had an “abusive partner”, I felt like being abusive at the reminder that I had NO partner and was simply abusing myself, or maybe she meant the abusive slippery steps on my back deck.. I don’t know. I like the fracture clinic near St Vincents for service and nice doctors. We’re on a first name basis with the entire staff.

  3. Laelaps says:

    That’s exactly what happened when I broke my right wrist! I was about 11 and had been sitting on a skateboard, rolling down a hill. My mother told me to try standing up, so I did, and promptly fell down on the driveway. I complained about wrist pain but she didn’t believe me, until she took me to Multi-Care and said it was a minor fracture and all I needed was a brace. About a week or two later, it was confirmed broken by another doctor and I needed a cast (this is during the summer too, so swimming in the neighbor’s pool went out of the picture). I haven’t had any breaks since then, but it definitely was an odd experience.

  4. azureavian says:

    i feel the same way about Madelenn. first she breaks her arm. “how did it happen?” me: “umm either she fell off the bunkbed or she was pushed. no one seems to know” (was resolved that Ana turned around and unintentionally bumped Madelenn off and she fell, striking the metal ladder with her elbow). next time i bring them in (less than 18 mo later) with a slash across Madelenn’s cheek. she had slipped and fell against the tracks to the shower door and cut her chin to the bone. i thought it sounded like a weak excuse, but it was what happened and i think she confirmed it when i left the room for a minute.
    next i bring them in with blistering burns. (top ramen accident). i was sure that they were going to call CPS on me. seriously. but what can you really do when the kid is seriously accident prone? i can just be grateful she doesn’t eat the mushrooms in the grass or that she isn’t allergic to any foods.

  5. Mimi says:

    Poor Fisher, poor you! Hugs.

  6. stephanie t. says:

    Sounds like my summer with #3 daughter, Lauren, age 7…Nothing broken ‘that they could see’ (just LOVE that!. I STILL haven’t gotten the real story of how she did it. My hunch was some leap from a very high place (the girl likes to ‘catch air’) The good part?? Getting to keep the x-rays!
    Same thing happened to me at age 15…X-rays for break/fractured bones in my ankle/foot looked clear…two days later, after agonizing pain, they called to say “oops we made a mistake” It sucks, but it happens.
    Have fun with it…make his cast into some goth collage and seal it with crystal lacquer LOL!

  7. summer says:

    Dude. Just…dude.

  8. Amy Sorensen says:

    I stand by my idea that kids’ injuries are just as painful for the mom as they are for the kids, just in a different way. I know that for every single one of my kids’ many, many, MANY ER-requirement accidents, for weeks and weeks afterwards I find myself retracing my steps, thinking about how I could have changed the outcome. I think, though, that with two active boys, you’re likely to experience this again, and some kids just have more accidents. But it still is painful for YOU, too. Glad you got some time away anyway…

  9. Herm says:

    Poor Fisher! He’s got delicate little bones, I guess. Is it possible he also has is parents’ awful eyesight? That could explain the multiple falls. Or maybe he just has his auntie’s natural clumsiness.

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